Why Do We Keep Having the Same Argument?

Couples often bring a catalogue of issues. Underneath, it is often one dance: one pursues, one shuts down; one corrects, one defends. The content is the costume. If you recognise the first three sentences of a fight, you are in a loop, not a new problem.

Try changing only the opening. Slower. One thing. ‘I felt alone when…’ rather than a court case. If it heats, pause before the old lines. Repair after: ‘I went to my usual place. I’m back.’